Today’s post is a SubscribeStar Saturday exclusive. To read the full post, subscribe to my SubscribeStar page for $1 a month or more. For a full rundown of everything your subscription gets, click here.
Well, the 2025 Spooktacular is in the books. My neighbor called it “the last bachelor Spooktacular,” as it’s the last front porch recital before my wedding. It is also distinct in that it is very likely the last front porch recital at my current home, as Dr. Fiancée and I are in the process of purchasing a home. Of course, if my house lingers on the market for an extended period—a distinct possibility in my rural community—we could see a Spring Jam in Lamar in May 2026. We shall see!
But I digress. The “last bachelor Spooktacular” was truly a bachelor’s endeavor. None of my family could attend, and Dr. Fiancée was both sick and up the entire night before on-call. That meant yours portly had to take care of the preparations solo.
Fortunately, I’d gotten a head-start by working around the house each night after work. By the time last Saturday rolled around, however, I was absolutely wiped out, and slept in until after 11 AM—a rarity for me. Dr. Fiancée suspects that I was sick (I repeated the sleeping-in feat the following day), and I had been fighting off a cold most of the week, but even with my delayed start, I managed to get everything done. I even made my Mom’s legendary Rotel dip, which consists of melting vast quantities of Velveeta “cheese” product and mixing it with two cans of Rotel diced tomatoes and green chilis. I apparently did it right, because it was a hit.
Regardless, there was still a good bit to do in the yard and on the front porch. I’m not exactly big on regular cleaning—another quality of my rapidly expiring bachelorhood—and my front porch was looking pretty forlorn. The yard itself was a bit rough, but my neighbor had mowed it earlier in the week, so I mainly just had to deal with the flower beds and some pruning.
It was a day of little things going awry. For example, I grill hot dogs for the festivities. My grill had plenty of propane, but the electric starter wouldn’t work. When I went to get a stem lighter to light the grill manually, the lighter was out of butane. I couldn’t locate any matches, so I surrendered and decided to boil the hot dogs (on the plus side, my grill got a good cleaning). When I made the Rotel dip, I had the heat too high and some of the cheesy goo bubbled over onto my stove. John’s PA had a faulty cable—and so on.
But, in spite of it all—and I was more stressed than this post is letting on—the event was a success.
To read the rest of this post, subscribe to my SubscribeStar page for $1 a month or more.