Tag: fast food

TBT: Held Hostage by a Trans Autist at McDonald’s

The Portly Politico10 Comments

In looking for a piece to reblog for this installment of TBT, I stumbled upon this piece involving some late-night McDonald’s shenanigans.  I really should compile a short collection of essays about my various misadventures at McDonald’s—and other fast food joints.  Slapping together fifty pages musing about fast food in the 2020s would be much like the food itself—cheap, reprocessed garbage that costs too much and is unfit for human consumption.

And yet, the cheap flavor and saltiness of such a volume would entice just as a nocturnal cheeseburger might.  What say you, dear readers?  Should I put together such a lofty tome?  Leave a comment and let me know.

With that, here is 2 April 2025’s “Held Hostage by a Trans Autist at McDonald’s“:

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TBT: McDonald’s: A Vision of Our Dystopian Future

The Portly Politico10 Comments

Last March I wrote a lengthy post about different experiences at three different McDonald’s, two in different parts of South Carolina, one somewhere in the wilderness that blurs between Georgia and Florida.  According to my budgeting software, the last time I purchased anything from McDonald’s was 17 March 2024, which is shortly before I wrote this post on 20 March 2024.

I like McDonald’s.  I do not like what it has become—overpriced, low-quality fast food.  The classical trade-off of fast food generally, and McDonald’s particularly, is that, in exchange for low-quality food, you get high consistency and low cost.  Now the experience is expensive, inconsistent, and inconvenient.

In other words, it’s not worth it.  I’ve always seen McDonald’s as “travel food”—the kind of cheap crap you shovel into your face on a long road trip because it’s quick, hot, and fairly delicious—not as everyday fare, but there are so many superior options.  Taco Bell is a vastly more affordable fast food experience, and the food is better—and, I’ll risk claiming it, marginally better for you.  I’m not saying Taco Bell is healthy, but a bean burrito is filling and cheap, and way less life-ruining than a Big Mac.

That said, I’m hankering for a Shamrock Shake.  ‘Tis the season.  If I head back to a McDonald’s anytime soon, I’ll be sure to give a full report on the weird, alien world I encounter.

With that, here is 20 March 2024’s “McDonald’s: A Vision of Our Dystopian Future“:

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McDonald’s: A Vision of Our Dystopian Future

The Portly Politico22 Comments

Ever since The Age of The Virus, I’ve noticed a general decline in the quality and value of dining and amenities.  Every restaurant, hotel, airline, and putt-putt golf course used The Virus as an excuse to trim out all of those little “extras” that we did not consider as such, those little dashes of additional service or product that made visits to these places memorable.  Things like peanuts at corporate steakhouses, or regular cleaning of your linens at hotels (apparently, towels aren’t even a given anymore).  Meanwhile, prices at all of these businesses have increased, far outstripping “official” inflation numbers.

We all know that is true; furthermore, we all know it already.  But what if we look at the lowest common denominator, the dregs of these businesses?  What if we look at fast food?

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TBT: Phone it in Friday VI: Valentine’s Day

The Portly Politico22 Comments

Well, it’s not quite Valentine’s Day yet, but I thought it would be worth looking back to 2020’s Valentine’s Day post, which was mostly a collection of various blog posts and reflections on the holiday.

I’m still wondering how Jay Nordlinger gets to travel the world writing pithy little observations about violin concertos and the like.  How do I position myself to take his place when he finally retires or kicks the bucket?  Who else is going to critique all those free concerts in Vienna?

But I digress.  The Season of Love is upon us, and I suspect restaurants will be packed this weekend with lovers canoodling over their cannoli (or, in the case of the high number of breakups on Valentine’s Day than average, crying into their kishka).  Sounds like another weekend of frozen pizza and spaghetti for yours portly.

So, here’s some great stuff from better writers to celebrate your Valentine’s Day Weekend.  It’s 14 February 2020’s “Phone it in Friday VI: Valentine’s Day“:

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Ending Neverending Benefits

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According to Scott Rasmussen’s Number of the Day for Tuesday, 8 June 2021, 71% of voters favor ending supplemental insurance benefits.  Indeed, according to last Friday’s Number of the Day, twenty-five States have already ended or plan to end pandemic-related unemployment benefits.  South Carolina is among those twenty-five States, all of which have Republican governors (Vermont and Massachusetts are the the only two States with Republican governors who have not ended the benefits), thus demonstrating once again that the Republican Party, for all of its faults, is still the party of commonsense.

As I’ve written recently, excessive unemployment benefits account for the current labor shortage, which in turn has fueled inflation.  It seemed to hit the fast food industry first, as workers could make more money staying at home than returning to their reopening restaurants.  As I detailed in “Fast Food Premium,” restaurants began offering higher pay, signing bonuses, and even cash for submitting an application.  All of those costs get factored into the price of the final product, causing prices to increase.

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Lazy Sunday CXI: Bric-a-Brac II

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In the spirit of yesterday’s Subscribe Star post “Bric-a-Brac,” it seemed like a good time to do another miscellaneous edition of Lazy Sunday.  Blogging daily means there are a plethora of miscellaneous posts that don’t necessarily fit into any major category, but as I noted in yesterday’s post, miscellany is the spice of life.

  • “SimEarth” – I’ve been jonesing lately for four or five uninterrupted hours to sit down and play video games.  I’m a grown man with many responsibilities, but every now and then I want to spend an afternoon playing Civilization VI, conquering the world via cultural influence as France.  Las summer while recovering from a mystery illness I had the time to do some gaming, and dove back into the classic planet simulation SimEarth.  This post details my pitiful attempts at playing God.
  • “Fast Food Premium” – This post, which is about UBI and the perils it presents, uses the fast food industry to illustrate the point.  Blogger buddy jonolan at Reflections from a Murky Pond generously reblogged it, providing his own, more in-depth commentary to supplement my brief sketch of the idea.  I highly recommend you check out his post.
  • “SubscribeStar Saturday: Bric-a-Brac” (post on my SubscribeStar page) – The meat of this post is behind the paywall, so the preview just makes it sound like a self-indulgent essay on the toys on a windowsill in my kitchen.  My point is deeper, though:  little figurines, decorations, etc., aren’t merely pleasant trappings; they’re individual little touches that express our individuality, our creativity, and our liberty.  Little touches give life and warmth to our homes.

Well, that’s it!  Here’s hoping you enjoy this slightly-belated edition of Lazy Sunday.

Happy Sunday!

—TPP

Other Lazy Sunday Installments:

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Fast Food Premium

The Portly Politico8 Comments

There’s been a lot of discussion of UBI—Universal Basic Income—over the last few years, especially with the presidential primary run of Andrew Yang.  The concept is seductive in its simplicity:  gut the welfare state and its behemoth apparatus of bureaucratic pencil pushers and middlemen, and just cut every adult citizen a monthly check.

For fiscal conservatives, it’s a particularly toothsome Devil’s Bargain:  streamline an inefficient and wasteful bureaucracy and simply direct deposit a grand every month into Americans’ checking accounts.  Of course, it’s a siren song:  we’d just get the payments and still suffer with an entrenched bureaucracy, claiming $1000 a month isn’t enough to meet the specialized needs of whatever community they pretend to support.

Even if the deal were struck and every redundant welfare program were eliminated, there UBI would still be a bad idea.  Besides the absurdity of merely paying people to exist, it’s inherently inflationary:  if you give everyone $1000 a month, prices are going to go up.  Just as college tuition has soared because universities realized they could jack up the price and federal loans would expand to cover the costs, UBI would cause a similar rise in prices.  Sure, it’d be great at first, but the inflationary effects would kick in quickly.

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Phone it in Friday VI: Valentine’s Day

The Portly Politico3 Comments

Happy Valentine’s Day, readers!  Don’t try going out to eat tonight—it’s going to be a mad house.  Sensible couples will probably wait and dine out on a less sexy night, like Tuesday, or pick up Taco Bell.

We’re in the midst of a glorious four-day “Winter Break.”  The great thing about teaching is all the bogus holidays.  Valentine’s Day and President’s Day just happen to bookend the weekend, so why not turn it into a slightly-extended holiday?

In the spirit of Jay Nordlinger, today’s post is going to be a series of barely-related reflections, as well as some links to the stuff you should read or watch.  Speaking of Nordlinger, how do I land a gig getting paid to write about classical music in exotic parts of the world?

But I digress.  Here are some reflections on this Day of Love:

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Lazy Sunday XLI: Food

The Portly Politico34 Comments

‘Tis the season for excessive consumption, dear readers.  For a blog with a synonym for “fat” in the title, I’ve yet to feature a Lazy Sunday about food.

Well, that’s about to change.  Here are four succulent pieces about food—and my favorite vice, gluttony:

  • “#MAGAWeek2019: Fast Food” – One of the pieces from MAGAWeek 2019 (all exclusive to my SubscribeStar Page with a $1/month subscription), this little essay is an ode to the glories of fast food.  Fast food truly is a modern-day miracle, bringing together advancements in agriculture, food preparation, logistics, etc., into one gloriously low-priced, high-fat package.
  • “The Future of Barbecue” – The inspiration for this post was a piece at the Abbeville Institute, which detailed the deleterious effect of “mass,” or mass-market, barbecue chains on mom and pop barbecue joints, as well as the tradition of community barbecue.  It’s one of the many interesting chapters in the negative consequences of unbridled economic growth and efficiency at the cost of tradition and community.
  • “Shrinkflation” – Another SubscribeStar Saturday exclusive, this piece examines the shrinking size of beloved foodstuffs.  Did you know a two-liter Coke isn’t really two-liters anymore?  Ever noticed how Twinkies don’t seem as big as they used to appear?  Well, in an effort to cut cost (and, presumably, to bamboozle consumers), many food processors cut the sizes of their products in order to hide cost increases from customers.  I’ve had the gnawing feeling lately that the future we live in is far less amazing than it’s supposed to be; here’s another example of reality disappointing us yet again.
  • “Bologna” – I was really stretching when I wrote this post (just this past Friday), but, well, I love bologna.  In our current age of hyper-politicization, even the sandwich meat we consume says something about socio-economic status and our outlook on life.  Bologna is the humble mystery meat of the workingman, and I cherish its delicious, cost-effective flavor.

That’s it!  I’m looking forward to stuffing my face with gleeful abandon over the next few days (you know, to celebrate the Birth of Jesus).  Then I’ve got to reverse course; my jeans are ever-snugger, and my double-chin has slowly made a comeback.  Yikes!

Happy Eating—and Merry Christmas!

—TPP

Other Lazy Sunday Installments:

Bologna

The Portly Politico5 Comments

The long national nightmare is over.  No, not the impeachment farce; it’s the end of the semester!  Grades are in the books, work is done, and teachers and students are heading out for two weeks of glorious Christmas Break.

It’s been an eventful week.  As the House was fulminating about Trump’s alleged “crimes,” I was playing a gig with our community jazz band.  I play second alto sax with the group, but I asked to sing a song on this concert.

It’s long been a dream of mine to sing with a full jazz swing band behind me, and that dream came true Wednesday evening.  I sang Andy Williams’s “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year,” and was a nervous wreck (if you’ve seen the lyrics to that tune, you’ll understand why—what a mouthful!).  But I got through it admirably enough, even with a low-grade sinus infection.

The gig was during the dinner hour at a large church in town.  The first alto player indicated how hungry he was, and wondered if he could get a plate.  I told him (unhelpfully) that I’d eaten a bologna sandwich in my car before coming in (which sounds like a joke and/or the most mundane, pathetic detail in the world, but it was true).  All the old guys in the band—it’s a swing band, so there are a lot of them—expressed their enthusiasm for bologna sandwiches, and asked how it was prepared:  did I use mustard?  “Nope, Duke’s mayonnaise, with cheese.”  Murmurs of approval followed.

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