Well, it’s finally happened: pending some signatures and initials from folks at The Bull Terrier Rescue Mission (at the time of this writing; they will likely be immortalized in digital ink by the time you read these words), I have officially adopted Murphy.
It’s been quite an adventure since I picked her up at the Sam’s Club in Goldsboro, North Carolina on 22 July 2021. Since then, she’s been all over the I-20 Corridor in South Carolina, and all the way to Athens, Georgia. She’s spent a great deal of time sleeping on couches—those on which she is allowed, and those from which she is forbidden—and she seems to win fans wherever she goes.
Indeed, she’s already become a popular figure here in Lamar. Neighborhood kids love Murphy, and Murphy loves them. We’ve taken some nice walks now that the weather has cooled down, and kids will stop playing to come up and pet her.
My adult neighbors love her, too. My Star Wars neighbor takes her out a couple of times a day while I am at work, and he enjoys relaying her humorous behavior to me. Murphy is a great lover of rolling around in the grass, which she does frequently after slowly—and I do mean slowly—getting up from her daytime naps.
As I’m writing this post (from the sofa), she is going to town on some gigantic knee bone dog treat my girlfriend accidentally left here. It’s the first time since getting home from work that she’s given me some peace, as she’s been dying to go outside literally every fifteen minutes. That’s even after a long walk around the neighborhood, during which both of us ran for some short stretches (very short—she’s old, and I’m fat, so we’re not sprinting for long). Like my girlfriend, Murphy has intuited that when I am at my computer, I am not paying attention to her, so I relocated to the couch in the hopes that she might lounge up here with my while I write.
Naturally, like most women, as soon as I gave her what she wanted, she ignored me. Yeesh!
Regardless, it’s wonderful that it’s finally official, and that she’s mine. Of course, that means I’ve got to take on the vet bills and such, too, but she seems to be in much better shape after some early vet visits and two months of affection and junk food at my house. She’s taking another trip to the groomer this weekend (while I proctor the SAT), so she’ll grow even more spoiled.
Now that’s officially my dog, I’ll actually write fewer Bull Terrier Tuesday posts. Barring major updates, I won’t subject readers to these excessively self-indulgent, cringe-inducing posts about my dog too frequently.
But don’t worry, Murphy fans—you’ll still get the important updates: vet visits, canine adventures, health crises, etc. The day I have her taxidermied and put on display in my den will be a heartbreakingly momentous occasion.
Just kidding about that last part.
Well, Murphy has left her bone behind and is staring at me expectantly. Time to snuggle up for a bit before bed.
Read more about The Bull Terrier Rescue Mission, and consider making them a donation.
The Portly Politico 
Congratulations, Papa. Happy for you both. I’m saying a small prayer that what we read is not so – that owners begin to look like their dogs. Poor ol’ Murph has a face only her mother – and you – could love (wink). Wishing you both many happy days together.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Audre, I think that is a very tactful way of saying that Murphy – why the boy’s name? – would not win any beauty contests unlike my Sweetie of course but it is clear that she is the apple of Tyler’s eye and that is all that counts.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The original owner named her Murphy. I believe her official name (according to some documents on her I have received from the rescue) was “Murphae Murderface.” You see, Alys, we have in America a group of people called “white trash”—I believe you call them the Scottish*—that aren’t exactly masters of thoughtfulness, self-reflection, and self-restraint.
That said, many people think of _Murphy Brown_, the television show, as an example of a female Murphy. It’s definitely a boy’s name, in my opinion, but at this point, I’m used to it, and I’m not going to change her name after eight years.
*Just kidding.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m nothing if not ‘tactful’. (she says, rolling on the floor laughing). And of course, “All hail Sweetie”.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahaha, yes, I think Murphy is super cute, but I don’t want her nose, that’s for sure. If she’s lucky, she’ll start looking more like me. ; D
LikeLiked by 1 person
Brilliant stuff, Tyler. Congratulations to you and Murphy – dogs, not too similar to cats, aren’t fond of change and she will like the stability. 🙂
Bull terriers, in the UK, tend to be seen as chav dogs – steel and sometimes studded collars, intimidating, just how their chav owners like them to look. I think many of us tend to forget that appearances can be deceiving and these dogs can be as warm and gentile as many other breeds. It all depends on how they are cared for.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yes, I think bull terriers have in Britain the same association that pit bulls have here in the States—dangerous dogs bred by dangerous people to do dangerous things. That said, I am still very biased against pit bulls, which are bred for aggression. Some of them are (apparently) quite lovely family pets, but the risks are too great. I was a bit on the fence about taking in a bull terrier for similar reasons, though they have a more lovable reputation here in the States thanks to Spuds MacKenzie and Bullseye, the Target dog.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Concerning Murphy’s name I did assume she had been endowed as Murphy before she came to you Tyler. I do find that American thing of giving girls boys’ names odd though.
As for Britain’s ‘white trash’ the lefty liberal types have long labelled as such anyone who challeneges their anti Brexit, pro immigration, anti patriotic, pro LGBT etc view of the world so that ‘white trash’ would encompass most of the decent hard working men and women who keep this country running by emptying bins, working in shops, slogging away on building sites, looking after other people’s children, driving delivery vans and lorries and so on, you get the picture.
I have a number of American cookbooks and my favourite is proudly titled White Trash. I love it. It actually contains a recipe for possum.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yes, I don’t understand why we want to give girls boy’s names, and vice versa. It doesn’t make sense.
The elites of our country view the matter the same way, Alys. I personally make a distinction between “rednecks”—decent, hardworking people, often (in the South) of a feisty Scotch-Irish extraction: the descendants of the frontiersmen and risk-takers who built this country—and “white trash,” who have fallen, by choice or otherwise, into a life of dependency and emptiness. But I certainly feel for them, and their plight, and members of both groups make up portions of my extended family.
_White Trash_ the cookbook sounds like a fun one. Have you tried the possum recipe yet?
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have only seen photographs of possum and none of then scream at me ‘I would just love to catch one, skin and butcher it and do something delicious with it involving aromatic herbs and a bottle of Cotes du Rhone’. Nope, more likely to turn me pernanently vegetarian.
There is a chapter on pones and cornbread though and some great photographs one of which is of the interior of a fridge. Said fridge does not appear to contain any actual food that could be used to make a nutritious meal but only a conglomeration of cans, bottles and packets containing goodness knows what. Both hilarious and concerning re the health of the owner.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Sounds like my refrigerator and freezer at present—lots of delicious frozen foods and hot dogs and the like. I will hasten to add that I have lost 9.3 pounds since I began counting calories again last Monday. I don’t expect to maintain that ungodly pace of weight loss forever, mind you, but those are the early gains from cutting back.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Also, I was cracking up reading your description of what possum does _not_ scream to you—brilliant!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Tyler, I have lost between one and a half and two stone since the middle of February, initially kickstarted by giving up alcohol for Lent and then reducing my calorie intake by roughly a quarter. I have (largely) kept off the gin and red wine but still eat all the things I enjoy. I try to fast for eighteen hours between the last time in the day I eat until I eat anything else the following day. Seems to be working. I drink copious amounts of tea.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Sounds like a very effective system, Alys! Good for you. It’s amazing how many empty calories are in drinks, alcoholic or otherwise. I’ve known many people who have given up alcohol and/or soft drinks, and they’ve seen weight melt away with little additional effort.
I also hear quite a bit about “intermittent fasting,” which I think is similar to the eighteen-hour fast you’ve described. I typically do a twelve-hour fast: I eat dinner around 6 or 6:30 PM, then don’t eat again until around 6 or 6:30 AM. I’ve found that cutting out snacking really helps me, and my meals are currently falling about six hours apart—6 AM, 12 PM, and 6 PM.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I really only have one meal a day now – with a pudding or dessert – and then a snack later on within the six hour window. If I am absolutely starving in the morning I have breakfast and then forego the snack later. For many years I had a couple of stiff gin and tonics – often more – every day plus wine with food. Breaking that habit was a huge thing for me and I did it because I was doing it for Jesus. As someone who is a compulsive cook I have found reducing my calories harder than not drinking but I am slowly shifting excess pounds. I have never eaten takeaway or so called fast food apart from the very occasional portion of fish and chips. As well as never having watched Star Wars I have never been to Maccy D’s either although I do like a good homemade burger.
LikeLiked by 2 people
That is quite rigorous! But it sounds like a winning formula for losing and keeping off the weight.
Whenever I get to England, I will take you out for a Big Mac and a supersized French fry. Just make sure you don’t eat a couple of days beforehand.
LikeLiked by 1 person