SubscribeStar Saturday: The Bare Minimum

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The recent crackdown on crime, spearheaded by President Trump, in Washington, D.C.—as well as its incredible effectiveness—put to my mind the function of government at any level.  The most basic function—the bare minimum—that any government should perform is to protect the rights of its citizens from a.) foreign threats (invasion, violent illegal immigrants, etc.) and b.) domestic ones (crime).  Beyond that, governments should maintain and provide basic infrastructure that is conducive to commerce and mobility (roads, water, sewage) and should respond to the needs of their citizens as much as possible without infringing on the rights of the numeric minority.

That’s pretty much it.  Yet governments in the United States and Britain still fail to provide even those three simple functions—protection of people’s rights; provision of their basic infrastructural needs; and concern for their interests.

Case in point:  if the two nations’ leaders had really been paying attention to and cared about their constituents and their basic rights and needs, they never would have flooded their lands with illegal (and many legal) immigrants from foreign cultures.  Instead of conducting forever wars in distant lands, they would have paved the roads.  Instead of funneling money to Trojan Horse organizations designed to undermine our institutions with men in sundresses and mandatory DIE training, they would have invested in light rail or new water systems.

Instead, there’s been a sort of callous indifference to what normal—by which I mean average—people want.  It is abundantly clear that, had they been asked, most Americans and Britons would not have wanted endless streams of migration from the Third World.  They would not have accepted never-ending meddling in a part of the world that has been mired in conflict and authoritarianism since the Sumerian civilization first emerged around 4500 B.C.

It seems, however, that the tide is turning at last.

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TBT^16: Rebuilding Civilization: The Hunter-Gatherer

Yours portly is teaching World History for the second consecutive year (before last school year, the last time I’d taught the course was way back in the 2011-2012 school year, although I also taught the close cousin of World History, Western Civilization, at the local technical college more recently), and I love these early weeks of the course, as we talk about early civilizations and how they arose.  The short answer is “agriculture.”

That always gets me thinking about this post from 2021 about how remote hunter-gatherer tribes would survive the collapse of civilization—because they lack it entirely.

It occurred to me that these remote peoples likely would not be the ones “rebuilding civilization.”  Having not developed it in the first place, and seemingly unlikely to do so within any reasonable timeframe (because over the course of 6000 years of human civilization, they have never developed it), it seems like the best hope for civilization would, ironically, be the very peoples that destroyed it in the first place.

We see this pattern play out throughout history.  The people living in the remnants of the Roman Empire rebuilt—however slowly—a distinctly European civilization.  That’s not even mentioning the Eastern European or “Byzantine” Empire, which endured until 1453.  We often forget that only half of the Roman Empire collapsed in the first place.

But I digress.  I am a big believer in civilization, warts and all.

With that, here is 29 August 2024’s “TBT^4: Rebuilding Civilization: The Hunter-Gatherer“:

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“American” Trucking

It seems that lately there is an endless parade of evidence showing illegal immigrants behaving badly—or, at the very least, with lethal incompetence.  The latest example is the infamous Indian Sikh truck driver who made an unsignaled, last-minute U-turn, causing a family of three to crash into his trailer, killing them instantly.

An ex-girlfriend’s dad was a trucker for many years, and I remember him telling me that the state of the industry has really declined.  Instead of unionized drivers with rigorous training and employment protections, there are loads of young, hastily-trained, immigrant men driving recklessly.  As we saw with the Indian driver, many of these immigrants are here illegally, and come from cultures that do not hold human life sacred to the same extent as Western cultures.

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Open Mic Adventures CXLV: “Murphy on the Storm”

Here’s something a bit different for today’s Open Mic Adventures.  I’m never one to let anything go to waste, and that includes silly, improvised cover songs that I send as voice texts.

One morning a couple of weeks back I sang a “cover” of “Riders on the Storm,” the song by The Doors, but changed it to “Murphy on the Storm.”  I amused myself so much with my shenanigans that I texted a rendition to my older brother.  I then took that audio and plugged into iMovie on my phone, along with a picture of Murphy.

The result is absurdist hilarity.

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Monday Morning Movie Review: Intruder (1989)

The first, tiny hints of autumn are in the air in South Carolina.  Temperatures have been down the past few days, and I can just make out the tiniest bits of golden-brown in the leaves.  I announced the home varsity football this past Friday, and driving back up to campus with the windows down (my car’s A/C is still not working) gave me that sensation that only fall can give.

Naturally, this weather brings to my mind the best autumn holiday:  Halloween.  And Halloween means (among other things) horror movies.

Now, I’ve never been big on slashers, but one I re-watched recently on Shudder is a good example of the genre:  Intruder (1989).  Its unique setting—it takes place in a grocery store—and colorful cast of characters makes it really enjoyable.  It’s also strangely wholesome for a slasher; as I recall, there aren’t the usual lurid displays of teenage sexuality, just lots of grocery kills.

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SubscribeStar Saturday: Myrtle Beach 2025: Ripley’s Believe It or Not!

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My brothers and I took an overnight trip last weekend to Myrtle Beach.  Growing up, we would go to Myrtle Beach every summer for our dad to attend a big public works conference.  While he languished away in conference sessions all day, our mom would take us all over Myrtle Beach to various attractions.

Naturally, we have fond memories of these annual trips, and we have several regular spots we like to check out on our visits as adults.  One is the weird, wacky museum (for lack of a better word) that is Ripley’s Believe It or Not!

Ripley’s is named for the famed cartoonist Robert Ripley, who started his Believe It or Not! concept as a newspaper column.  Ripley travelled the world and scrupulously documented everyone of his claims, even employing a team of researchers to help corroborate the wild facts that came pouring in from his journeys and his readers alike.  Ripley built his first museum of oddities, which he called an “Odditorium,” in Chicago in 1933.  He was also responsible for mobilizing public opinion in favor of making “The Star-Spangled Banner” the official national anthem of the United States (Congress passed a law, which President Herbert Hoover signed into law, in 1931, making the song the official anthem).

Ripley’s “Odditoriums” capture something of the spirit of a circus sideshow while also being, essentially, cosmopolitan museums of anthropology and natural history.  If all of the artifacts, human remains, fossils, animals, etc., in a Ripley’s were presented less sensationally, almost all of them would fit nicely into the environment of your standard history or natural history museum.  Ripley’s, however, goes a step further, and makes these weird, scary, cool things even more weird, scary, and cool by way of a mysterious, slightly sleazy, very sensationalistic presentation.

Consider that the name of the “Odditoriums” officially end with an exclamation point:  Ripley’s Believe It or Not!  Almost every placard has a nice exclamation point in its description, adding that extra level of grammatical excitement.  It really draws attention to how wild, crazy, and/or unusual the factoid is, which just makes it even more memorable.

Then, of course, there are the artifacts themselves.  Some are replicas; some are full-sized wax figures; some are actual artifacts.  I was surprised by the sheer number of actual human remains on display in the museum, from shrunken heads to limbs to mummies.  There are additionally wax reproductions of people with strange deformities, like a man with two pupils and irises in each eye; a Chinese man with a candle implanted into his skull; and a woman with a horn growing out of her head.  There’s even a model of a pig, John Arnold, with six legs (and he’s from Darlington, South Carolina!):

The museum has a fun, often spooky, slightly dangerous feel to it, even though it is perfectly safe.  It very much conjures up that sensation of being at a weird circus or county fair, with all sorts of freaks and oddballs skulking about.

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Phone it in Friday CI: YouTube Roundup CLXI: Hoarder House

As readers know from my epic “Ululations for U-Haul,” I had to move a significant amount of heavy and large furniture from my future in-laws’ house to my humble abode.  My house is not large—it’s roughly 1000-square feet—and already stuffed with my junk.

Fortunately, I’m excellent at Tetris and the grandson of a furniture store owner.  I also grew up in a Victorian house that my mother crammed so full of knick-knacks, bric-a-brac, and gewgaws that I know how to maneuver around tight spaces overstuffed with furniture.  As such, I’ve adapted well to my new hoarder-like conditions.

I documented the state of my home post-move, mainly for my future in-laws’ amusement.  Then I uploaded it to YouTube, where it somehow managed to rack up 1,469 views (at the time of writing).  Let’s get that to 1500, eh, dear readers?

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Open Mic Adventures CXLIV: “Divertimento in D”

Assuming CD Baby does its job and approves my submissions, I’ll have three albums releasing on 1 September 2025 (which also happens to be Labor Day this year in the United States).  Regardless, they’ll be released in the wee hours of Labor Day morning on my Bandcamp page.  These releases will be my first since Leftovers IV landed on 21 April 2025 (the day after Easter).

Today I’m featuring another piece from one of these releases, the album Ringtone Circus.  This piece was one of the last I wrote for the album, but it’s one of my favorites.

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First Day of School 2025

No Monday Morning Movie Review today, dear readers.  Today is the first day of the 2025-2026 academic year at yours portly’s school.  I spent last week prepping for today—making copies, compiling music, arranging my classroom, etc.—and we are off to the races!

I’m very fortunate to have a similar schedule to last year’s:  two sections of World History, and one each of my High School and Middle School Music Ensembles.  My schedule is heavily weight towards afternoon classes, but I’ll have ample planning time in the mornings.

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