Monday Morning Movie Review: Superbowl Halftime Show

After a long day in the parks we got back to our rooms last night and settled in for sub sandwiches and television.  I had forgotten that the Super Bowl was airing last night, but my older brother did not, and he had the game on in our room.  While I rested and unpacked, the game entered halftime, featuring the infamous Puerto Rican rapper Bad Bunny, began to unfold.

By the end of the show—or by the point I stopped watching to get dinner in the other rooms—I was convinced that we needed to grant Puerto Rico its independence (while probably maintaining some naval bases there or the like).  It was the least American halftime show I’ve ever seen.

Read More »

Monday Morning Movie Review: Carrie (1976)

Last week I found time to watch a few flicks, among them 1976’s Carrie, the coming-of-telekinesis story of Carrie, who is bullied relentlessly both at school and home.  Her mother’s Pharisaical view of redemption (essentially, there is none) makes Carrie’s life sheltered; meanwhile, Carrie’s classmates bully her in part because of her mother’s insanity.

Family lore has made this film legendary.  According to legend, my parents went to see this film on their honeymoon in 1977.  I don’t know exactly when it occurred, but my dad—who was raised Pentecostal (Church of God – Cleveland, Tennessee) was so beside himself, he walked out.  My mom (raised Southern Baptist, and, therefore, a bit less bee-hived in her hairdos) was a fan of Stephen King—then an emerging author in many respects—and it apparently was a shock to her that my dad reacted as he did.

Having just seen the film, I can see why my dad got so uncomfortable.  It literally opens with a quasi-pornographic shot of Carrie showering herself after gym class—and then receiving a visit from Aunt Flo.  There’s also the iconic “prayer closet” with a Jesus sporting menacing, glowing eyes.  The anti-Christian messaging is pretty strong.

That said, the film is not, I would argue, primarily a screed against religion, although that is a part of it.  Carrie’s mom is a nut, but anyone with even a passing familiarity with Christ’s Teachings would realize that her religion is not Christianity.  It’s some kind of perversion of something resembling Christianity into a legalistic tangle of extreme ascetism coupled with brutality.

Instead, Carrie is very much a coming-of-age story, in which the sheltered Carrie attempts to spread her wings and become her own woman, but instead is met only with resistance at every time.  Having developed no healthy relationships—and faced only mockery and scorn from her mother, her schoolmates, and even the principal—she lashes out in the film’s fiery conclusion.

Read More »

TBT: Make Greenland American

Yours portly has a lengthy post over at Free Speech Backlash today about Trump, Venezuela, and the intersection between American nationalism (“America First”) and American imperialism (the piece is called “Trump: Nationalist or Imperialist?“).  “Imperialism” is a dirty word, but America is an empire, whether we like it or not.  Indeed, we’ve been an empire since at least 1898, when the United States gained Puerto Rico, Guam, and the Philippines from Spain, and occupied Cuba for several years.  Cuba became nominally independent, but remained a virtual American protectorate until Fidel Castro’s Communist revolution in the 1950s.

Many on the Right are concerned that the Maduro capture is something of a “heel turn,” to use wrestling parlance, for Trump’s foreign policy, and that he’s abandoning America First principles in favor of open-ended American adventurism abroad.  My piece details why Maduro’s arrest is not another quagmire, and how it’s very consistent with traditional American foreign policy dating back to the Monroe Doctrine of 1823.

Similarly, Trump’s desire to annex Greenland, which sounds like a joke or someone playing a True Start Location Earth map in Civilization VI, is quite serious.  Greenland is in the Western Hemisphere, which—whether we like it or not—is America’s hemisphere.  American geopolitical strategy since 1823 has been to dominate this hemisphere to avoid a balance-of-power situation like Europe’s in the nineteenth century.  It is also seeks to prevent foreign intervention into the independent nations of this hemisphere.  One reason for the Maduro operation was to prevent Maduro from selling his country off to the Chinese, which would put America’s primary geopolitical rival in our backyard.

Similarly, China and Russia have designs on the Arctic, with the former particularly attempting to gain influence over the tiny Greenlandic population.  Denmark is entirely too venal to combat foreign intervention in its colony, so greater, more serious powers will do so.  With ice caps receding, the Arctic is the great oceanic chokepoint of the twenty-first century, and America needs Greenland to secure our interests in the Western Hemisphere—and to keep China out.

It’s unpleasant to think about Great Power politics in the twenty-first century, when we’re supposed to be beyond all that foolishness.  But it is the rules-based international order of the 1990s that is the aberration, not the kinds of aggressive power plays we’re seeing today.

Taking Greenland—which the Trump Administration seems intent to do—is part of the broader return to Reality the world is experiencing.  Reality is often hard, but it cannot be ignored.

I wish no violence upon Greenland or Denmark—far from it!  Greenland does not need to be taken by force.  At a certain point, the United States can offer Greenlanders a package so enticing, they cannot refuse.  Denmark should be eager to offload an expensive asset that they are not using—and that the bankroller of their social welfare state is willing to go to great lengths to obtain.

With that, here is 15 January 2025’s “Make Greenland American“:

Read More »

Monday Morning Movie Review: 28 Days Later (2002)

The next film in the 28 [Unit of Time] series, 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple hits theaters this weekend, and yours portly is hoping that Dr. Wife and I can squeeze in a matinee showing this Saturday.  It also seems that Shudder has a couple of the earlier films on its service, including 28 Days Later (2002), which I stayed up late last night to finish watching.

I wasn’t sure I had seen this flick before, but several of the key scenes did click with me (like the father getting a single drop of infected blood in his eye, causing him to go made with the Rage virus).  I have seen it, but I’d forgotten most of the major plot points and the ending.  With the new film releasing this weekend, it was a good opportunity to refresh my memory (Shudder also has 28 Weeks Later [2007], which I watched recently as well).  I’d forgotten what a great film it is.

Read More »

TBT^16: The Joy of Romantic Music II: Bedřich Smetana’s “The Moldau”

Other than a quick piece I dashed off earlier this week, I haven’t had much time for composing.  However, my koi pond adventures have inspired me—just in time to reblog this post about one of my favorite pieces of Romantic music.

That the piece is about a river is appropriate—while my koi are swirling about in a murky pond, the watery imagery is a source of inspiration for the piece that is slowly taking shape in mind.

I actually have an idea for the cover art for the album that will feature this imagined piece.  I took a picture of these cool little koi tea cups that Dr. Wife got me for my birthday on one of the pianos at school:

Regardless, I’ve always loved this piece, ever since I read about it in Roger Kamien’s Music: An Appreciation, Brief 8th Edition (that’s an Amazon Affiliate link; I receive a portion of any purchases made through that link, at no additional cost to you) and listened to it with my students.

With that, here is 9 January 2025’s “TBT^4: The Joy of Romantic Music II: Bedřich Smetana’s ‘The Moldau’“:

Read More »

TBT^4: Napoleonic Christmas

It’s Christmas!  It’s Christmas!  And it’s a Thursday, so yours portly is TBT’ing to a classic of yesterchristmas.

Back in 2019, I wrote this piece about Napoleon.  It took off because it gained some traction on WhatFinger News, which came along after Matthew Drudge inexplicably went woke.  The name of this alternative news aggregator always strikes me as vaguely inappropriate, but they ran my link and it got tons of views at a time when I was getting discouraged with the blog (a perennial issue, it seems—perseverance is a virtue for a reason).

Napoleon is a complex and intriguing figure.  Whatever his personal and professional attributes, he indelibly changed Europe and the world.  It’s hard for us to understand today, fixated as we are on the failed Austrian painter with the Charlie Chaplin mustache, but Napoleon’s impact was still being discussed actively in the early twentieth century.  He totally upended the gameboard of Europe—for good or for ill—and the fear and/or hope of another Napoleon endured for quite awhile.

YouTube philosopher Agora made a great video linking the two figures—and warning about why those links miss some key differences:

The important thing to remember, however, is that humanity’s conception of “greatness” is false.  Remember, Christ Was Born today as a simple baby in the most humble of circumstances—literally bedding down in a feeding trough for barnyard animals.  He Died a humiliating Death on the Cross.  He Rose from the dead and Conquered Death, and Will Return again!

No Napoleon could ever achieve what He Did.

With that, here is 26 December 2024’s “TBT^2: Napoleonic Christmas“:

Read More »

Memorable Monday Morning Movie Review: A Very Portly Christmas: It’s a Wonderful Life (1946)

With Christmas just a few days, I’m continuing to look back to Christmas movie reviews of yesteryear.  Today, I’m reflecting on what might be the quintessential Christmas movie, 1946’s It’s a Wonderful Life (that’s an Amazon Affiliate link; I receive a portion of every purchase made through that link, at no additional cost to you).

I have a vivid early memory of watching the movie on Christmas night at my late paternal grandparents’ house, and staying up very late to finish it.  My Papa was sitting in his recliner, and my cousins and I were on the floor.  It’s wild to consider that a black-and-white film could hold the attention of a roomful of rambunctious younguns, but that speaks to the quality and the magic of this film.

With that, here is 29 December 2022’s “Delayed Monday Morning Movie Review: A Very Portly Christmas: It’s a Wonderful Life (1946)“:

Read More »

Memorable Monday Morning Movie Review: Nefarious (2023)

Last year, when Dr. Wife was still Dr. Girlfriend, we sat down and watched an incredible movie exploring demonic possession and spiritual warfare.

That film was 2023’s Nefarious (that’s an Amazon Affiliate link; I receive a portion of any purchases made through that link, at no additional cost to you).  It’s one of the best films I’ve seen in years, and it’s an overtly Christian film (without making it feel like it’s overtly Christian).  It’s an excellent example of how Christians can make compelling art that espouses our beliefs culturally.

With that, here is 2 December 2024’s “Monday Morning Movie Review: Nefarious (2023)“:

Read More »

Memorable Monday Morning Movie Review: A Very Portly Christmas: A Christmas Carol (1951)

Back in 2022 a couple of my regular contributors and I each took turns reviewing the 1951 film adaptation of Charles Dickens’s A Christmas Carol (for links to all three reviews, click here).  The film has since became almost annual viewing for yours portly, a tradition I hope to continue with Dr. Wife.

With all the busyness of the wedding and last week’s school play (as well as this week’s school concert), I decided to take this morning to look back at my review from three years ago.

The film is a poignant reminder to keep the joy of Christmas alive in our hearts, something that is often difficult as the trials of adulthood responsibility exact their toll.  But Christmas is the time of year to celebrate the Birth of Jesus, and to recapture—to the extent possible—the simple magic of childhood.

With that, here is 19 December 2022’s “Monday Morning Movie Review: A Very Portly Christmas: A Christmas Carol (1951)“:

Read More »

Monday Morning Movie Review: Ponty Praises: The Usual Suspects (1995)

Good old Ponty sent along this awesome review before I headed out on my honeymoon, which saves me the creative effort of crafting a thoughtful review of some crappy movie after being unplugged for the past week.

Instead, you get this great review of an awesome movie.  Anytime Italo Calvino is referenced in a movie review, you know it’s going to be good.

I’m sure I’ve seen The Usual Suspects—or I thought I was sure until I read Ponty’s review.  Now… I’m not so sure.  Based on his review, I’ll have to head his advice to see it posthaste.  Perhaps Dr. Wife and I can enjoy it over Christmas.  I’m still planning on showing her Gremlins (1984).

Just a note—several of the links in this review are Amazon Affiliate links.  I receive a portion of any purchases made through these links at no additional cost to you.  I’ve marked these links with an asterisk (*).

With that, here is Ponty’s review of 1995’s The Usual Suspects:

Read More »